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Saturday, February 21, 2009

the spirit of life

Not a good night's sleep but ok. As ET tells me - above ground and breathing. I did work today and had a conversation with Kelly about the next chuck box for the Troop. And then at the end of the day read a pick me up from Jim. Great card Jim!!

My Sarah made me potato salad minus the lumps and pickles for supper. And Lucille made fish. Semi solid food and was it good!!! What a wonderful day God has given me. Not much pain but even working made me appreciate this day. Nothing fancy, just enjoying life.

I realize that the worst is yet to come but I will try my best to make the most of each day. And with the help of God, my family, close friends and thousands of supporters it will happen.

I do not know why I have this. But I know that God will use me to make the most of it if I let him. Maybe it will make me closer to him. Maybe I will be reaching out to someone to comfort as I am taking chemo. Maybe it's a wake up call to stop taking life, friends and loved ones for granted. Maybe it is to tell all of you reading this blog to STOP and smell the roses. You see, I believe that there is a silver lining in every dark cloud as we go through life. And I believe once you figure out what that lining is, then the dark cloud goes away. So here I am for a period of months to figure out the silver lining. And then to make the most of it! God will expose that in his way to me as I search for it. As Lucille says, we have to deal with what the cards are dealt to us. So instead of hating God for giving me this ( which I don't think happened ), I am looking for the positive that can happen! Hope you are with me for the long haul as I go through the bad times and the good times. As I cry and laugh, know that God is here walking beside me giving me strength to go another day.

My son thinks I got this via the propane fire I went through in 1999. It's as good a reason as any since all the questions the doctors ask me do not go with this cancer. So world, you have my attention. I will stop and smell the roses. I will reach out to others in need. I will say that compassionate word to ones who need comfort. I will continue to help my friends, whether physcially, mentally or just stuffing our faces over a good meal, like Kirk a few days ago. Well, for the next few months, I'll just watch them stuff their faces. I will love my family like never before.

Don't know about you, but am somewhat choked up writing this. But it is what is on my heart tonight. Too much idle time I guess, or maybe it is God speaking to you through me! As time goes on, I'm sure there will days that I will tell stories of things that have had an effect on me. Who knows, maybe I will have a best seller ( your suppose to laugh here ).

So as the 2nd week of this winds down, I look forward to Sunday. I think that is the day we are NOT supposed to work! You think God is telling all of us something?

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