What a 30 hour ride! Got up yesterday and was doing pretty good for the morning. Thought I had this part licked. But then the hicups started (only 49 in 17,000 do this), and lasted until the early evening. I was given a drug to fix that which in turn induced vomiting. This lasted until about 8am this morning and by 8:30 I was at Allison Cancer Center being wheeled around in a wheel chair. Jennifer (one of the chemo nurses) took me to a private room where I stayed until 5pm. Was given the usual hyrdation and yes the every 30 minutes trips to bathroom all day. Got more nausea medicine and was drugged to induce sleep. And to think I got all this treatment for just $35! What a deal!
It is now about 10:30pm and just finished showering which has lifted my spirits. But will be under the influence of these drugs thru Monday afternoon, when the pump comes off. Supper was about a 1/2 cup of mashed potatoes. Nothing seems to taste good at this point so force feeding will commence. But this too shall pass. My hair seems to be growing by leaps and bounds for the anticipated Troop hair cut on Tuesday.
The good news is that the doctors have identified what is causing the nausea so they will be able to avoid a repeat of this when the second round starts on Mar 24.
I had a really good blog set for this time with the hiccups but mind will not let me put it on paper. Maybe tomorrow I can give the light hearted jabs about hiccups. But until then I will sleep this round of drugs off, drink my water and get my calories. Thanks for your continued support, prayers and cards and emails. They really boost our spirits. I can't imagine going thru this without the support group that is here. Thanks again.
Friday, February 27, 2009
Where in the World Is Steve?
Posted by Lucille
By now, you've noticed that Steve wasn't able to post last night. Massive doses of chemo have finally taken command of his body. This morning, he is still very, very sick. We have called the oncologist and are anxiously awaiting his response.
Until then, we continue to be blessed by you and your outpouring of love and care. We thank each of you for food and your time in preparing it and bringing it by. We thank you for your visits, hugs, and words of encouragement. We thank you for your thoughtful and careful consideration of books and movies that we will enjoy as we spend these months trying to forget the pain while remembering the joy and friends and family. We thank you for remembering that Steve must be hydrated and for bringing quarts and quarts of Pedialyte. But more than anything else, we thank you for holding us up in prayer.
As always, we continue to thank Him for each and everyone of you.
By now, you've noticed that Steve wasn't able to post last night. Massive doses of chemo have finally taken command of his body. This morning, he is still very, very sick. We have called the oncologist and are anxiously awaiting his response.
Until then, we continue to be blessed by you and your outpouring of love and care. We thank each of you for food and your time in preparing it and bringing it by. We thank you for your visits, hugs, and words of encouragement. We thank you for your thoughtful and careful consideration of books and movies that we will enjoy as we spend these months trying to forget the pain while remembering the joy and friends and family. We thank you for remembering that Steve must be hydrated and for bringing quarts and quarts of Pedialyte. But more than anything else, we thank you for holding us up in prayer.
As always, we continue to thank Him for each and everyone of you.
Wednesday, February 25, 2009
The beginning of the end
As of this time of day - the score is cancer 1 Steve 2. Went and started chemo at 8:30 this morning and got home at 4pm. If I was not going to the restroom enough they cured that problem! I had two hours of nothing but hydration! So learned real quick on how to roll the stand to the bathroom. Got pretty good at it. The worst part was I went the bathroom before leaving the cancer center and had to make a mad dash to the bathroom at home. Now that is about 10 - 12 minute drive!! While it is funny to read and I laugh at it myself - the reason is because they don't want the chemo to be in the stomach and liver for long periods of time as it is not good for it. So my trips over the next 8 days will be short and ready access to the bathroom or at least a large tree!!
Ports are great. Breathe deep and exhale. The nurse then chases the port with a needle to push it in. While this needle is in, everything is done through it! Only problem I see is if the pump falls and half my chest is pulled down! It hurts even thinking about it! But the good news is that when I have had the needle in the arm, I can feel all the fluids going into the vein. And while I do feel the chemo and other feel good drugs going into my chest, it is not irritating. It's quite a sensation tasting the different chemos as they enter your system. I'm pretty sure my taste buds will really be screwed up for awhile.
I had three different chemo put in my body. Two at the clinic and one that is being administered via a pump that I have to wear for five days. While most people have their chemo inside their pump, I'm so special that my chemo has to be in a separate bag outside the pump! Aren't I special?? I even have "Steve Vaughan" on my bag. (laugh here people!!) Spent the first couple hours trying to get warm. Lots of fluids made my body cold so ended up with three blankets to finally get warm. Manly me, I was going to tough it out with 2 blankets. The result of the third blanket is in the next paragragh.
I did take a two hour nap this morning and slept good. Ask the staff if they would just take care of me for the next 8 days at the clinic. But after 4 hours of sitting in the chair (other that making trips to the restroom), I got up and stood up for about 30 minutes doing stretches. Needless to say I think I was the talk among the nurses. Kirsten is a fabulous nurse but had to take a corner of her totin chip for cutting herself at home last night! (laugh again - but for those not in Scouting, a totin chip is a card that says someone knows how to use a knife and every time they mess up they lose a corner. In my Troop, if you bleed you lose the whole card and have to take the course again!).
Sleeping will be an adventure for the next week and what to do with this pump. And so will bathing. And wearing clothes!! So my fashion wife and daughter have purchased a wardrobe to take care of this fashion mess! (you should be rolling in the floor by now!!) Me, I would just let it all hang out!! News flash - our home is now a potential hazardous site! Lucille has a hazmat suit she has to wear if any of the chemo leaks out and I have to clean the toilet (and that is after flushing twice!) after use to wash all the chemo down the drain.
Biggest problem over the next 8 days is enough to drink and to be constantly eating to keep food in my stomach. Only semi solid food and lots of drinks. About the only thing I am not eating are spicy foods and solid meat. Saving the pure liquid for radiation!! Smart huh!!??
Super snack still on the way and the first of five nights sleeping with the pump which makes sounds every minute or so, Lucille and two dogs. But more on that later. Hope all find this as enjoyable as I have in writing it. Have a good evening all and thanks for the support of the beginning of the end..
By the way, score is now cancer 1, Steve 3
Ports are great. Breathe deep and exhale. The nurse then chases the port with a needle to push it in. While this needle is in, everything is done through it! Only problem I see is if the pump falls and half my chest is pulled down! It hurts even thinking about it! But the good news is that when I have had the needle in the arm, I can feel all the fluids going into the vein. And while I do feel the chemo and other feel good drugs going into my chest, it is not irritating. It's quite a sensation tasting the different chemos as they enter your system. I'm pretty sure my taste buds will really be screwed up for awhile.
I had three different chemo put in my body. Two at the clinic and one that is being administered via a pump that I have to wear for five days. While most people have their chemo inside their pump, I'm so special that my chemo has to be in a separate bag outside the pump! Aren't I special?? I even have "Steve Vaughan" on my bag. (laugh here people!!) Spent the first couple hours trying to get warm. Lots of fluids made my body cold so ended up with three blankets to finally get warm. Manly me, I was going to tough it out with 2 blankets. The result of the third blanket is in the next paragragh.
I did take a two hour nap this morning and slept good. Ask the staff if they would just take care of me for the next 8 days at the clinic. But after 4 hours of sitting in the chair (other that making trips to the restroom), I got up and stood up for about 30 minutes doing stretches. Needless to say I think I was the talk among the nurses. Kirsten is a fabulous nurse but had to take a corner of her totin chip for cutting herself at home last night! (laugh again - but for those not in Scouting, a totin chip is a card that says someone knows how to use a knife and every time they mess up they lose a corner. In my Troop, if you bleed you lose the whole card and have to take the course again!).
Sleeping will be an adventure for the next week and what to do with this pump. And so will bathing. And wearing clothes!! So my fashion wife and daughter have purchased a wardrobe to take care of this fashion mess! (you should be rolling in the floor by now!!) Me, I would just let it all hang out!! News flash - our home is now a potential hazardous site! Lucille has a hazmat suit she has to wear if any of the chemo leaks out and I have to clean the toilet (and that is after flushing twice!) after use to wash all the chemo down the drain.
Biggest problem over the next 8 days is enough to drink and to be constantly eating to keep food in my stomach. Only semi solid food and lots of drinks. About the only thing I am not eating are spicy foods and solid meat. Saving the pure liquid for radiation!! Smart huh!!??
Super snack still on the way and the first of five nights sleeping with the pump which makes sounds every minute or so, Lucille and two dogs. But more on that later. Hope all find this as enjoyable as I have in writing it. Have a good evening all and thanks for the support of the beginning of the end..
By the way, score is now cancer 1, Steve 3
Tuesday, February 24, 2009
The day before...
Well, tomorrow morning starts the road to recovery. At 8:30am I will start the chemo process.
Didn't think I would have any doctors visits today, but dentist called and saw him at 4:45pm. So instead of five teeth, I now think it will be six and possibly seven teeth they will take out around March 18. The good news is that there will be less to floss and less to brush!
Biggest problem I have right now is getting enough rest. The liquids and food seem to be ok, just not getting quite enough rest. First half of the night is good then the tossing and turning start for the next few hours. But guess when I get tired enough I will sleep. Did take a little nap this afternoon and it was ok. Guess I need a good dull book to put me to sleep.
The day started out eating a doughnut hole with my grandson - Harrison. Then worked on the Troop Court of Honor that we had this evening. Which went well. There are two adult leaders in this Troop that I had a charcoal print made of them for all the unselfish work they do. I think they were really surprised. First time in 24 years I was not the master of ceremonies. But my voice just will not take continual talk for an hour. But I expect the audience was glad not to have to listen to my lame attempt at jokes!
I just want to thank everyone for their cards, prayers and support. It means alot to us and will help us thru this ordeal. While cancer typically happens to one person it becomes a family ordeal. And becomes an ordeal for all the friends and workers. I feel for anyone who has to go at this alone. I have learned already that cancer folks are a very special breed of people. So there will be another group of people to know and to help. Tall Paul had a lymph node taken out and found out today that it was not cancer. This is great news and thank God for taking care of him.
Besides protein drinks today, I had some mashed potatos, refried beans, cheese and a couple bowls of fruit salad. Topped it off with some chocolate cake tonight. Will have cup of tea and possibly something else light before bed. Used to I worried about eating too close to bedtime but the doctor says to eat all the in smaller quantites so this part is fun. Now if I don't lose the weight during radiation, then I'm in big trouble!! Anyone up for a fudge ice cream bar??
Didn't think I would have any doctors visits today, but dentist called and saw him at 4:45pm. So instead of five teeth, I now think it will be six and possibly seven teeth they will take out around March 18. The good news is that there will be less to floss and less to brush!
Biggest problem I have right now is getting enough rest. The liquids and food seem to be ok, just not getting quite enough rest. First half of the night is good then the tossing and turning start for the next few hours. But guess when I get tired enough I will sleep. Did take a little nap this afternoon and it was ok. Guess I need a good dull book to put me to sleep.
The day started out eating a doughnut hole with my grandson - Harrison. Then worked on the Troop Court of Honor that we had this evening. Which went well. There are two adult leaders in this Troop that I had a charcoal print made of them for all the unselfish work they do. I think they were really surprised. First time in 24 years I was not the master of ceremonies. But my voice just will not take continual talk for an hour. But I expect the audience was glad not to have to listen to my lame attempt at jokes!
I just want to thank everyone for their cards, prayers and support. It means alot to us and will help us thru this ordeal. While cancer typically happens to one person it becomes a family ordeal. And becomes an ordeal for all the friends and workers. I feel for anyone who has to go at this alone. I have learned already that cancer folks are a very special breed of people. So there will be another group of people to know and to help. Tall Paul had a lymph node taken out and found out today that it was not cancer. This is great news and thank God for taking care of him.
Besides protein drinks today, I had some mashed potatos, refried beans, cheese and a couple bowls of fruit salad. Topped it off with some chocolate cake tonight. Will have cup of tea and possibly something else light before bed. Used to I worried about eating too close to bedtime but the doctor says to eat all the in smaller quantites so this part is fun. Now if I don't lose the weight during radiation, then I'm in big trouble!! Anyone up for a fudge ice cream bar??
Monday, February 23, 2009
God hears our prayers
Well gang, I am cured!! No, not quite but the results of the CT and PET scan came through today and it was better than I had anticipated. There is some cancer starting on the right side of my throat and a cancer on my vertebra which is affecting the nerves in my left arm. Now you may think that this is a bad thing but now the good news. I now know why my left arm was giving me problems and it will be cured. All of the chiropractor treatments and steroid shots were for naught as it was this cancer causing this. And the better news is that the cancer is so small that only the PET scan picked it up. And this chemo treatment will take care of it without radiation. The cancer on my left side (the bad side) was a 36. The cancer on the right side of my throat was a 11. And the chemo doc seems to think that the chemo will take care of this cancer also. Still have to have radiation on my left throat. So God has answered many prayers (except the one person who was praying for me to get fat) and given all that could be happening I think he has answered one here.
Today has been a good day overall. Even went to get me some motorcycle sunglasses. Guess it will really make me cool. (you should be laughing hard now). Then spend the day talking to clients and working. Weather was good, clients were great - what a day!
I should tell all of you what wonderful kids we have. I don't think there is a better set of kids anywhere. The sacrifices they are making for us is overwhelming. Not sure I did anything right but evidently Lucille did alot right!!!!! (Lucille says, "Whatever.")
At this point I will have two rounds of chemo which means two months and then 6 weeks of radiation with a low dose of chemo. Folks that is two weeks short of 4 months. I think I heard Philmont calling me!! There will be some rough days but they will be fewer than the good days!
Today I ate an apple for lunch. Solid food. Who knows maybe the Scout House will see me there some Tuesday night enjoying a hamburger with the guys. With all the people keeping tabs on me, I will not need to worry about food or drink or keeping my 2000 calories a day going into me.
Tomorrow I have no doctors, no chemo, no operations, no tests. I get to have a doughnut with Harrison (my grandson of 4). And then a full day of work.
We ask and God provides. Then we have to accept what God gives. Ain't God GREAT!!
Today has been a good day overall. Even went to get me some motorcycle sunglasses. Guess it will really make me cool. (you should be laughing hard now). Then spend the day talking to clients and working. Weather was good, clients were great - what a day!
I should tell all of you what wonderful kids we have. I don't think there is a better set of kids anywhere. The sacrifices they are making for us is overwhelming. Not sure I did anything right but evidently Lucille did alot right!!!!! (Lucille says, "Whatever.")
At this point I will have two rounds of chemo which means two months and then 6 weeks of radiation with a low dose of chemo. Folks that is two weeks short of 4 months. I think I heard Philmont calling me!! There will be some rough days but they will be fewer than the good days!
Today I ate an apple for lunch. Solid food. Who knows maybe the Scout House will see me there some Tuesday night enjoying a hamburger with the guys. With all the people keeping tabs on me, I will not need to worry about food or drink or keeping my 2000 calories a day going into me.
Tomorrow I have no doctors, no chemo, no operations, no tests. I get to have a doughnut with Harrison (my grandson of 4). And then a full day of work.
We ask and God provides. Then we have to accept what God gives. Ain't God GREAT!!
Sunday, February 22, 2009
Don't ya just love Sundays?
Got to sleep in - if you call 8:30 early! Dogs have a way of making sure you don't get to sleep in! For some reason they think they need food in the morning! So got up, fed the dogs, turned on the coffee, read the paper. Then I made scrambled eggs with cheese while Lucille made pancakes. Great breakfast!! Then helped Lucille clean the house - yes, I can vacuum. At least I make an attempt at it! Weighed myself after breakfast and I weighed 159.
Adam put a counter and location hit on the blog. It has been uplifting to see how many people are looking at this and where the hits are coming from. Don't know who is in New Jersey, but thanks for the support! It will be interesting and fun to follow it in the weeks ahead.
I actually slept for my mid-day nap today. Lucille and Sarah went and relaxed - I believe it is called shopping! Then I worked on plans for the chuck box. Late this afternoon, Kelly and I had another brainstorming session on the plans. The only thing worse than two accountants working on this would be two engineers! Accountants are worried about using all the materials purchased - engineers are worried about the square corners and safety aspects.
It has been a great day today. I know my throat is there but as compared to some previous days it was great! No work - just a day for relaxing and resting. I have gotten addicted to the military channel. Must be a guy thing!! After all isn't HGTV the only good thing on TV?
I have kept myself from thinking about this week too much as tomorrow we get the results of the PET scan and start chemo on Wednesday. And that is the day that actually starts the countdown to killing this foreign object in my body!!
See you tomorrow......
Adam put a counter and location hit on the blog. It has been uplifting to see how many people are looking at this and where the hits are coming from. Don't know who is in New Jersey, but thanks for the support! It will be interesting and fun to follow it in the weeks ahead.
I actually slept for my mid-day nap today. Lucille and Sarah went and relaxed - I believe it is called shopping! Then I worked on plans for the chuck box. Late this afternoon, Kelly and I had another brainstorming session on the plans. The only thing worse than two accountants working on this would be two engineers! Accountants are worried about using all the materials purchased - engineers are worried about the square corners and safety aspects.
It has been a great day today. I know my throat is there but as compared to some previous days it was great! No work - just a day for relaxing and resting. I have gotten addicted to the military channel. Must be a guy thing!! After all isn't HGTV the only good thing on TV?
I have kept myself from thinking about this week too much as tomorrow we get the results of the PET scan and start chemo on Wednesday. And that is the day that actually starts the countdown to killing this foreign object in my body!!
See you tomorrow......
Saturday, February 21, 2009
the spirit of life
Not a good night's sleep but ok. As ET tells me - above ground and breathing. I did work today and had a conversation with Kelly about the next chuck box for the Troop. And then at the end of the day read a pick me up from Jim. Great card Jim!!
My Sarah made me potato salad minus the lumps and pickles for supper. And Lucille made fish. Semi solid food and was it good!!! What a wonderful day God has given me. Not much pain but even working made me appreciate this day. Nothing fancy, just enjoying life.
I realize that the worst is yet to come but I will try my best to make the most of each day. And with the help of God, my family, close friends and thousands of supporters it will happen.
I do not know why I have this. But I know that God will use me to make the most of it if I let him. Maybe it will make me closer to him. Maybe I will be reaching out to someone to comfort as I am taking chemo. Maybe it's a wake up call to stop taking life, friends and loved ones for granted. Maybe it is to tell all of you reading this blog to STOP and smell the roses. You see, I believe that there is a silver lining in every dark cloud as we go through life. And I believe once you figure out what that lining is, then the dark cloud goes away. So here I am for a period of months to figure out the silver lining. And then to make the most of it! God will expose that in his way to me as I search for it. As Lucille says, we have to deal with what the cards are dealt to us. So instead of hating God for giving me this ( which I don't think happened ), I am looking for the positive that can happen! Hope you are with me for the long haul as I go through the bad times and the good times. As I cry and laugh, know that God is here walking beside me giving me strength to go another day.
My son thinks I got this via the propane fire I went through in 1999. It's as good a reason as any since all the questions the doctors ask me do not go with this cancer. So world, you have my attention. I will stop and smell the roses. I will reach out to others in need. I will say that compassionate word to ones who need comfort. I will continue to help my friends, whether physcially, mentally or just stuffing our faces over a good meal, like Kirk a few days ago. Well, for the next few months, I'll just watch them stuff their faces. I will love my family like never before.
Don't know about you, but am somewhat choked up writing this. But it is what is on my heart tonight. Too much idle time I guess, or maybe it is God speaking to you through me! As time goes on, I'm sure there will days that I will tell stories of things that have had an effect on me. Who knows, maybe I will have a best seller ( your suppose to laugh here ).
So as the 2nd week of this winds down, I look forward to Sunday. I think that is the day we are NOT supposed to work! You think God is telling all of us something?
My Sarah made me potato salad minus the lumps and pickles for supper. And Lucille made fish. Semi solid food and was it good!!! What a wonderful day God has given me. Not much pain but even working made me appreciate this day. Nothing fancy, just enjoying life.
I realize that the worst is yet to come but I will try my best to make the most of each day. And with the help of God, my family, close friends and thousands of supporters it will happen.
I do not know why I have this. But I know that God will use me to make the most of it if I let him. Maybe it will make me closer to him. Maybe I will be reaching out to someone to comfort as I am taking chemo. Maybe it's a wake up call to stop taking life, friends and loved ones for granted. Maybe it is to tell all of you reading this blog to STOP and smell the roses. You see, I believe that there is a silver lining in every dark cloud as we go through life. And I believe once you figure out what that lining is, then the dark cloud goes away. So here I am for a period of months to figure out the silver lining. And then to make the most of it! God will expose that in his way to me as I search for it. As Lucille says, we have to deal with what the cards are dealt to us. So instead of hating God for giving me this ( which I don't think happened ), I am looking for the positive that can happen! Hope you are with me for the long haul as I go through the bad times and the good times. As I cry and laugh, know that God is here walking beside me giving me strength to go another day.
My son thinks I got this via the propane fire I went through in 1999. It's as good a reason as any since all the questions the doctors ask me do not go with this cancer. So world, you have my attention. I will stop and smell the roses. I will reach out to others in need. I will say that compassionate word to ones who need comfort. I will continue to help my friends, whether physcially, mentally or just stuffing our faces over a good meal, like Kirk a few days ago. Well, for the next few months, I'll just watch them stuff their faces. I will love my family like never before.
Don't know about you, but am somewhat choked up writing this. But it is what is on my heart tonight. Too much idle time I guess, or maybe it is God speaking to you through me! As time goes on, I'm sure there will days that I will tell stories of things that have had an effect on me. Who knows, maybe I will have a best seller ( your suppose to laugh here ).
So as the 2nd week of this winds down, I look forward to Sunday. I think that is the day we are NOT supposed to work! You think God is telling all of us something?
Friday, February 20, 2009
yea it's friday
Needless to say yesterday was not a particularily good day. Have to have about 6 good teeth pulled in early March. I guess the good news is I get to keep some! I did find out that radiation will be six weeks in duration. So I am looking at it as a count down. Just like this is the first week gone in the six month ordeal!
Have you ever had a sticker in your body that you couldn't get out? It would fester until the body pushed it out. Well the first 24 hours my body was reacting to this foreign being that wasn't supposed to be here (the port). But today my body seems to be accepting it more maybe realizing that it is a good thing in my body to help it recover.
Got up this morning after a semi good sleep but ready for work. Got to work and got alot accomplished this morning. Was determined that if I have a bad day the next day would be a great day! Spent part of the afternoon lecturing a UTPB class about graphics. But the best news was from Dr Patel about the tonsil. Oh yea - that was the little rascal that started this whole mess! Anyway the tonsil ( or I gather the lack of the tonsil ) is great. He said the pain in my ear is from the throat now. Tonight I wanted to try some solid food. Did not think that Taco Villa french fries could be sooooooooooo good. Well, that is until they got cold! Tried a taco burger but the bun was just too mushy to eat. It was not enough so came home to a wonderful bowl of potato soup which was great! John Petree brought it by and at this writing I am getting my belly full. Think I might try a hamburger patty tomorrow night! When you don't get to eat, then the little things you get to eat are priceless. Walker (my grandson) and I talked about the same foods we will be eating soon. Once radiation starts it is a straight liquid diet for the duration of the six weeks plus the recovery time to the mouth and throat to heal. That hamburger with all the trimmings will taste so wonderful.!
Have been told that I have to consume 2000 calories a day! It will be alot of protein drinks. But that beats having a tube put in my stomach. See there is a reward to everything, you just have to find it!!!
This week is done and have had only 1 real bad day. I know there will be others but am determined the good days will outlast the bad ones. Thanks for all the support and for the continued support as I know ya'll are here for the long haul (6 months). Have a great weekend!
Have you ever had a sticker in your body that you couldn't get out? It would fester until the body pushed it out. Well the first 24 hours my body was reacting to this foreign being that wasn't supposed to be here (the port). But today my body seems to be accepting it more maybe realizing that it is a good thing in my body to help it recover.
Got up this morning after a semi good sleep but ready for work. Got to work and got alot accomplished this morning. Was determined that if I have a bad day the next day would be a great day! Spent part of the afternoon lecturing a UTPB class about graphics. But the best news was from Dr Patel about the tonsil. Oh yea - that was the little rascal that started this whole mess! Anyway the tonsil ( or I gather the lack of the tonsil ) is great. He said the pain in my ear is from the throat now. Tonight I wanted to try some solid food. Did not think that Taco Villa french fries could be sooooooooooo good. Well, that is until they got cold! Tried a taco burger but the bun was just too mushy to eat. It was not enough so came home to a wonderful bowl of potato soup which was great! John Petree brought it by and at this writing I am getting my belly full. Think I might try a hamburger patty tomorrow night! When you don't get to eat, then the little things you get to eat are priceless. Walker (my grandson) and I talked about the same foods we will be eating soon. Once radiation starts it is a straight liquid diet for the duration of the six weeks plus the recovery time to the mouth and throat to heal. That hamburger with all the trimmings will taste so wonderful.!
Have been told that I have to consume 2000 calories a day! It will be alot of protein drinks. But that beats having a tube put in my stomach. See there is a reward to everything, you just have to find it!!!
This week is done and have had only 1 real bad day. I know there will be others but am determined the good days will outlast the bad ones. Thanks for all the support and for the continued support as I know ya'll are here for the long haul (6 months). Have a great weekend!
Thursday, February 19, 2009
He'll Bring a Better Day
Today was filled with information that causes the strongest to feel weak. As I write this, Steve has surrounded himself with his support group. The Scoutmaster's of Troop 175 have, through the years, been through births, deaths, graduations, illness, and marriage. As a unified group, they've laughed, cried, laughed, and watched as "their boys" have grown into men.
As blog readers know, our morning appointment was with Dr. Corwin, the radiologist. The news was grim. Steve won't be eating that hamburger for a long, long time. In fact, he won't be able to swallow anything but liquids as the radiation causes his saliva gland to deteriorate and his throat, mouth, and tongue to become a mass of blisters. With a warm, kind smile and a compassionate voice, Dr. Corwin discussed the need for 2000 calories of liquid each day. If this becomes impossible, a feeding tube will be inserted into Steve's stomach.
"What about mashed potatoes?" I asked.
"Too much bulk to swallow," he responded.
"What about cream of wheat?
"Too rough on the throat."
Dr. Corwin had nothing but time. What do we need? What are our concerns? Then began the examination of Steve's throat. The pain that coursed through Steve's legs, arms, trunk, and eyes was difficult to watch. With his gloved hand, Dr. Corwin dug into the cancerous cavity in Steve's throat. Then, with his same calm demeanor, he reported that we needed to see an oral surgeon to remove teeth that might cause problems during radiation.
So this afternoon at 3:00, Steve went to the oral surgeon. After an examination, Dr. Cummings explained that 5-8 of Steve's molars must be removed. With the return of the PET scan as it marks tumor locations, we will know if the oral surgeon will need to take more teeth. Radiation, it seems, makes the jaw bone very porous. Any tooth that has a filling or crown must be removed before radiation can begin.
Many years ago, I had a very difficult child in my classroom. To help me through my rough days, my daddy gave me a devotional book entitled Lord, Don't Let It Rain at Recess. In the book, one devotion is called "Thoughts on a Foggy Day." Today, that's where we find ourselves. The fog seems to envelop us. The message, though, has been tested through the decades. We don't choose what cards we're dealt, but we do choose how we play our cards. With that, please know that even through this rough year ahead we will lift HIM up and know that with every cloud there really is a silver lining. Go now, read Romans 8:6, smile, and know that we thank our Lord for every remembrance of you.
And, as always, we thank you and ask that you continue your prayerful support.
As blog readers know, our morning appointment was with Dr. Corwin, the radiologist. The news was grim. Steve won't be eating that hamburger for a long, long time. In fact, he won't be able to swallow anything but liquids as the radiation causes his saliva gland to deteriorate and his throat, mouth, and tongue to become a mass of blisters. With a warm, kind smile and a compassionate voice, Dr. Corwin discussed the need for 2000 calories of liquid each day. If this becomes impossible, a feeding tube will be inserted into Steve's stomach.
"What about mashed potatoes?" I asked.
"Too much bulk to swallow," he responded.
"What about cream of wheat?
"Too rough on the throat."
Dr. Corwin had nothing but time. What do we need? What are our concerns? Then began the examination of Steve's throat. The pain that coursed through Steve's legs, arms, trunk, and eyes was difficult to watch. With his gloved hand, Dr. Corwin dug into the cancerous cavity in Steve's throat. Then, with his same calm demeanor, he reported that we needed to see an oral surgeon to remove teeth that might cause problems during radiation.
So this afternoon at 3:00, Steve went to the oral surgeon. After an examination, Dr. Cummings explained that 5-8 of Steve's molars must be removed. With the return of the PET scan as it marks tumor locations, we will know if the oral surgeon will need to take more teeth. Radiation, it seems, makes the jaw bone very porous. Any tooth that has a filling or crown must be removed before radiation can begin.
Many years ago, I had a very difficult child in my classroom. To help me through my rough days, my daddy gave me a devotional book entitled Lord, Don't Let It Rain at Recess. In the book, one devotion is called "Thoughts on a Foggy Day." Today, that's where we find ourselves. The fog seems to envelop us. The message, though, has been tested through the decades. We don't choose what cards we're dealt, but we do choose how we play our cards. With that, please know that even through this rough year ahead we will lift HIM up and know that with every cloud there really is a silver lining. Go now, read Romans 8:6, smile, and know that we thank our Lord for every remembrance of you.
And, as always, we thank you and ask that you continue your prayerful support.
Wednesday, February 18, 2009
another day another stick
Well gang - another step closer to starting to get rid of this bad demon. Had a port installed this morning at 9am. Was home around noon. Morphine is great. Was given just enough medicine to make me feel good and not feel any pain. Just felt pressure as the good doctor made the incision and then moved some muscle to put in the port. It runs straight in the vena cava vein which runs directly into the heart. Back to the morphine - after surgery, no pain, could eat and swallow and felt great. However, all good things must end as the half life of this medicine was just a couple of hours. I feel my body adjusting to the port and gather it will take a couple of days to fully adjust. But the good news at this point is no more sticks in the arm. All sticks in the future will be through this port. So the stick pain should be considerably less. It's not that I can't take the sticks, it is just something I don't like to do. I guess any shots will also be through this port. I think this port and I will become good friends for quite a while!
Is it a good thing when the out patient nurses know you by first name? Spent another two hours up there today with Judy. To show you how well morphine works, she gave me a turtle candy and it was great! Midland Memorial is the greatest once you get to the caring staff.
Slept for a few hours this afternoon and then got to trade port stories with my 2 year old grandson who had a port of his own for several months. He and his port were not the best of friends. "Pops has a booboo," he says as we played. He truly understands about being sick! Amazing for a two year old!
Hopefully tomorrow morning we will find out the results of the CT and PET scan this last week. Not that it will matter as the chemo is pretty heavy. Tomorrow's talk will be with the radiation doctor so will find out when that will start. The radiation will be to kill the cells in the neck. Chemo is for the rest of the body. It seems so long since Feb 4 and although it will be a rough road, I am anixous to get it started!
I hope all of you had a great day. If nothing else, it has made me appreciate every breath I take, every image I take with my eyes, every word with all those I know and love. Too often I think we take life for granted. Believe me, something like this makes you think about what God has given us and that we should never take it for granted!
Is it a good thing when the out patient nurses know you by first name? Spent another two hours up there today with Judy. To show you how well morphine works, she gave me a turtle candy and it was great! Midland Memorial is the greatest once you get to the caring staff.
Slept for a few hours this afternoon and then got to trade port stories with my 2 year old grandson who had a port of his own for several months. He and his port were not the best of friends. "Pops has a booboo," he says as we played. He truly understands about being sick! Amazing for a two year old!
Hopefully tomorrow morning we will find out the results of the CT and PET scan this last week. Not that it will matter as the chemo is pretty heavy. Tomorrow's talk will be with the radiation doctor so will find out when that will start. The radiation will be to kill the cells in the neck. Chemo is for the rest of the body. It seems so long since Feb 4 and although it will be a rough road, I am anixous to get it started!
I hope all of you had a great day. If nothing else, it has made me appreciate every breath I take, every image I take with my eyes, every word with all those I know and love. Too often I think we take life for granted. Believe me, something like this makes you think about what God has given us and that we should never take it for granted!
Tuesday, February 17, 2009
oh me oh my
And just when I thought it was going to be a few nice days before chemo and have realized that the tonsils are not healed and may not be before chemo starts. Oh me - but last night Lucille made mashed potatoes and meat loaf. And it was great!! Just have to be sure to not chew as much and all is ok! Oh my - tonight had the same and was in pain!! Tried to chew too much!
Went to chemo class today with 2 other couples. Jennifer (the nurse) kept saying such things like, oh Mr Vaughan yours will be a longer chemo run, or you will be at the lab a few hours longer than the normal 2 hours! I guess somebody is trying to tell me something!! I am having a port put into tomorrow morning and was told I would probably have it in for quite a while.. And she wasn't even my nurse I will be seeing!!! It seems I am the talk of the medical community!!!
So will be looking for some good books to read! Any suggestions? Still trying to get a full days work in and still be able to take a mid day nap. So far it hasn't worked although those close to me say that I am going to be locked down for that period if I don't start taking naps.
Oh me - am told by one person I will lose my hair and another said I will have a little thinning. Oh my - my boys in Troop 175 were greatly disappointed tonight when they could not shave me!
If I shed too much, Lucille will make me shave!! Your suppose to laugh here. If you know Lucille, then you realize she sheds constantly and still has so much hair that the hair dresser thins it once a month!
Am not use to being tired. Anyone have any suggestions for pep-me ups? So with that said about tired I am calling it a night. Thanks for your continued support and prayers. You do not know how much they are appreciated!!
Went to chemo class today with 2 other couples. Jennifer (the nurse) kept saying such things like, oh Mr Vaughan yours will be a longer chemo run, or you will be at the lab a few hours longer than the normal 2 hours! I guess somebody is trying to tell me something!! I am having a port put into tomorrow morning and was told I would probably have it in for quite a while.. And she wasn't even my nurse I will be seeing!!! It seems I am the talk of the medical community!!!
So will be looking for some good books to read! Any suggestions? Still trying to get a full days work in and still be able to take a mid day nap. So far it hasn't worked although those close to me say that I am going to be locked down for that period if I don't start taking naps.
Oh me - am told by one person I will lose my hair and another said I will have a little thinning. Oh my - my boys in Troop 175 were greatly disappointed tonight when they could not shave me!
If I shed too much, Lucille will make me shave!! Your suppose to laugh here. If you know Lucille, then you realize she sheds constantly and still has so much hair that the hair dresser thins it once a month!
Am not use to being tired. Anyone have any suggestions for pep-me ups? So with that said about tired I am calling it a night. Thanks for your continued support and prayers. You do not know how much they are appreciated!!
Monday, February 16, 2009
not again!!!!
Well, after starving myself to the point that my blood sugar was a very low 66, I had to drink barium again in addition to having radiation put into my body! But got to take a semi nap and a talk with God while waiting for the radiation to flow through my body. Now weigh 158 pounds in my socks. And right now I am starved and all I have in my office is chocolate! Will have a good (well as good as it can get) supper later this evening only to start starving myself for the port operation on Wednesday.
Now if you want a sure fire way of losing weigh..... First 4 days eat either jello or pudding. Only 1 small container per meal. Then you can add a small helping of smooth potatoes in place of the jello or pudding. This for a couple of more days. I lost 5 pounds from that!! Last night I had a salmon patty, broccoli and cheese and a hard boiled egg for supper and breakfast this morning was a hard boiled egg and a sliver of cheese! Ya think it would make a best seller??????
Throat is feeling somewhat better but no hamburger tonight!! And here I thought this week I could put a couple of pounds back on eating all the healthy stuff that I crave!!! (If your not laughing now, then evidently you don't know me!!)
Now if you want a sure fire way of losing weigh..... First 4 days eat either jello or pudding. Only 1 small container per meal. Then you can add a small helping of smooth potatoes in place of the jello or pudding. This for a couple of more days. I lost 5 pounds from that!! Last night I had a salmon patty, broccoli and cheese and a hard boiled egg for supper and breakfast this morning was a hard boiled egg and a sliver of cheese! Ya think it would make a best seller??????
Throat is feeling somewhat better but no hamburger tonight!! And here I thought this week I could put a couple of pounds back on eating all the healthy stuff that I crave!!! (If your not laughing now, then evidently you don't know me!!)
Sunday, February 15, 2009
weekend in review
Saturday was to be the breakout day!! What a disapointment! Could not get untracked and throat was certainly doing anything but what I expected it to do. Between sleeping, and sleeping and sleeping, I did not accomplish anything. Guess for the remainer of winter and spring I am reduced to wearing a cap or beanie to keep warm. And I haven't even lost all my hair yet. Although that may be happening sooner than later. Day I would rather forget. Today (Sunday) is much better. Ear still hurts but throat seems to be better. Doing a couple of little projects around house and getting ready for Flag Day tomorrow morning. Big PET scan tomorrow so only vegs and meat and water and coffee are on the eating menu. May end up eating baby food is this throat doesn't get any better!
Just a note to say thanks for the prayers and cards and emails. The cards and emails are a real picker-upper!!
Just a note to say thanks for the prayers and cards and emails. The cards and emails are a real picker-upper!!
Friday, February 13, 2009
ohhhhhhhhhhhh eeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!
What a way to end the second week of this ordeal... Told I had to have another cat scan. Little did I know that not only involved another iodine injection, but had to drink barium and to top or I guess to end it all, had to have an enema !!!! Certainly was not expecting all that today. Scan was to check for cancer in lungs, stomach and bowels!! You know if I had wanted to clean out my system (insides) I can think of better ways to do it!!
The good news is that my tonsil is about healed. Had 2 hard boiled eggs and fine hamburger and gravy tonight. Plus about 4 gallons of liquid this afternoon. So I have worn a path to the bathroom. If this keeps up, may have to have a catheter. What's one more tube they are going to put in me?? (Hope you're smiling).
Tomorrow is suppose to be miracle day with throat so we will see. If that is the case then here comes the hamburger, fries and shake. It will be short lived as my PET Scan is Monday at 1pm and have to be a total vegetarian starting Sunday at noon until this scan is done! I know how many of you know how long I have secretly wanted to be a vegetarian.
Still getting tired at end of day so will try to sleep in tomorrow, which means 7:30am! I continue to thank God for all of you who have lifted Lucille and myself up in prayers. Good night.
The good news is that my tonsil is about healed. Had 2 hard boiled eggs and fine hamburger and gravy tonight. Plus about 4 gallons of liquid this afternoon. So I have worn a path to the bathroom. If this keeps up, may have to have a catheter. What's one more tube they are going to put in me?? (Hope you're smiling).
Tomorrow is suppose to be miracle day with throat so we will see. If that is the case then here comes the hamburger, fries and shake. It will be short lived as my PET Scan is Monday at 1pm and have to be a total vegetarian starting Sunday at noon until this scan is done! I know how many of you know how long I have secretly wanted to be a vegetarian.
Still getting tired at end of day so will try to sleep in tomorrow, which means 7:30am! I continue to thank God for all of you who have lifted Lucille and myself up in prayers. Good night.
Thursday, February 12, 2009
I have met cancer and he is mine!!
Will start taking down this bad boy on Wed. Feb. 25, I start chemo to get rid of this demon! So I guess next week at Scouts I might give the boys an opportunity to shave my head! Not sure I trust them with clippers, but it will be one for the ages!! Drank coffee today so should be alot more stimulated. After all, isn't that what makes the world work? For those that know me, coffee is my stimuli!!!
Worked thru some pain about 3am and again at 4pm but am making lots of progress. Get to have egg yolks for supper!!! yum yum. Next week will be full of doctor visits, tests and one operation. Not sure I want to give up the codeine!! (This is a joke people!!!) One visit is the chemo class - so they can tell me how much I hurt and how sick I will be! Don't they think I can find out about it myself? (This is a joke - you should be laughing)
At this point, I gather that my worst days from chemo will be the 3 - 5 days after I start chemo. Then get 3 weeks to get energy back up. Like I said, coffee will be doing wonders. I will be the first to show them how good coffee works!!!!!
Go to Dr Patel (tonsil doctor) tomorrow to look at my throat. Not sure what he will find except one less tonsil! Looking forward to the day of real meat!
Worked thru some pain about 3am and again at 4pm but am making lots of progress. Get to have egg yolks for supper!!! yum yum. Next week will be full of doctor visits, tests and one operation. Not sure I want to give up the codeine!! (This is a joke people!!!) One visit is the chemo class - so they can tell me how much I hurt and how sick I will be! Don't they think I can find out about it myself? (This is a joke - you should be laughing)
At this point, I gather that my worst days from chemo will be the 3 - 5 days after I start chemo. Then get 3 weeks to get energy back up. Like I said, coffee will be doing wonders. I will be the first to show them how good coffee works!!!!!
Go to Dr Patel (tonsil doctor) tomorrow to look at my throat. Not sure what he will find except one less tonsil! Looking forward to the day of real meat!
Wednesday, February 11, 2009
feb 2/10
Worked for a couple of hours yesterday and felt pretty good. But then being on medicine with codine should make anyone feel good. That is, until it wear off!!!! So came to work yesterday full of energy and a zeal for getting alot of work done. Lasted until about 3 and then I crashed at 4 for a 4 hour nap!! So not quite where I want to be at this point so will go a little easier the rest of the week! Friday is day for a CT scan and a talk with Dr Patel (Dr who took out my tonsil)! Did you know you could lose 5 pounds eating just jello and pudding? I am so ready for a nice juicy hamburger!!
You Should Be Laughing
Ok gang – here is result of all afternoon meeting with Allison Cancer Center. I have to undergo two scans – a CT and a PET. Then in two weeks I will start the first round of chemo. Will spend all day on a Tuesday at Allsion and the other 4 days will be via a pump. (ET did this with his chemo.) Then 3 weeks without chemo. Then possibly another round of chemo. So at the end of 4 or 8 weeks I will start radiation for the throat. I do not know the duration but do not think it will be more than 30 days, then possible another round of chemo followed by at CT and PET scan and another bioposy on my throat. So for the next 5 to 6 months I will be in and out (although I’m sure most of you think I’m out of it all the time anyway) YOU SHOULD BE LAUGHING. I can actually have a reason to have a bed at the office (to take power naps) (my chair will be disappointed!!). Cure rate is good – best therapy is lots to drink, laughter, and good friends, all of which I have now.
Steve
Steve
The First Day
Hi everyone,
First of all, Lucille and I want to thank all of you who have prayed for me during this time. It is just the beginning and with God’s help, all will be ok. For those of you who have brought flowers, food, cards, visits – please accept our thanks. You never know how many friends you truly have until something like this happens.
Now for an update. Had surgery last Wednesday for an enlarged left tonsil. The doctor found cancer in the tonsil, then a mass behind the tonsil which he took out (which was pressed against the throat) and a stage 1 cancer in a lymph node (which the doctor took out). No cancer in the other lymph nodes that he saw. The throat cancer is a stage 2.
So today at 2pm we have a meeting with Allison Cancer Center to have a consultation on how this will be treated.
At this point, food is not a problem as I cannot eat anything solid and Lucille does not eat much. Your prayers and support have been and will be greatly appreciated. According to all the information, hydration will be one of my biggest problems. If you don’t have stock in Pedialyte, it may be time to invest!! (you're suppose to laugh here!)
I got to eat whipped potatoes yesterday. Did not know that potatoes could taste so good and that jello and pudding could taste so bad! And what a way to wing myself off coffee!
I will be communicating via email more in the immediate future due to the radiation and chemo on my throat. I know many of you will wonder how I will be so quiet. All I can say is – ain’t the internet and wireless wonderful? (Laugh again!)
I will be working as I can so I ask for your patience and support.
Steve
First of all, Lucille and I want to thank all of you who have prayed for me during this time. It is just the beginning and with God’s help, all will be ok. For those of you who have brought flowers, food, cards, visits – please accept our thanks. You never know how many friends you truly have until something like this happens.
Now for an update. Had surgery last Wednesday for an enlarged left tonsil. The doctor found cancer in the tonsil, then a mass behind the tonsil which he took out (which was pressed against the throat) and a stage 1 cancer in a lymph node (which the doctor took out). No cancer in the other lymph nodes that he saw. The throat cancer is a stage 2.
So today at 2pm we have a meeting with Allison Cancer Center to have a consultation on how this will be treated.
At this point, food is not a problem as I cannot eat anything solid and Lucille does not eat much. Your prayers and support have been and will be greatly appreciated. According to all the information, hydration will be one of my biggest problems. If you don’t have stock in Pedialyte, it may be time to invest!! (you're suppose to laugh here!)
I got to eat whipped potatoes yesterday. Did not know that potatoes could taste so good and that jello and pudding could taste so bad! And what a way to wing myself off coffee!
I will be communicating via email more in the immediate future due to the radiation and chemo on my throat. I know many of you will wonder how I will be so quiet. All I can say is – ain’t the internet and wireless wonderful? (Laugh again!)
I will be working as I can so I ask for your patience and support.
Steve
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
