Another day of healing.

Evening gang..

Not doing too bad today.My throat is getting better but not able to take more than a sip at a time. But patience is the key word here. SO I feed the tube, try drinking as much as I can when awake and get hydrated every other day. Will do the same next week.

I worked for a couple of hours today and will continue to try and do so so build up endurance. But I also slept this afternoon and as of now will not have any trouble sleeping tonight. I think this part is as tough as taking the treatments as you want so badly to feel better and it is all up to your body to get the healing done. So in that regard it is kind of frustrating, but this too shall pass.

I've had many comments on my neck so have posted the look of it today. It has healed very well. The cream the doctor gave me has done wonders. It's still a little tender but doing great.

The other pic is stuff I am feeding myself with. Lucille uses whole mile and cream to get the calories up to 850 per ounces. It is so much better than Ensure and I think the cost is not different. But alot less feeding to accomplish the same result. But I look forward to getting off it and back to food. I have all these free meals when I can start eating the big stuff. After all, I don't want to waste their money!!

Sent my Philmont boys and adults off today for their 12 day backpack trip. But just able to do it. Maybe in a couple of years. If up to it, I will go up on July 21 to see them come off the trail.

You just don't know how I pray for each of you for the blessings that God has put on my treatment and healing. You guys are the greatest support one could hope for. I have run out of words thanking you but my heart can't thank you enough! See ya later.

Working through phase 1

No hydration today. Will decide about Thursday later tonight. Got up feeling pretty good. Drank throughout the morning, worked for a couple of hours at shop and have rested and slept and drank this afternoon. Had to take stomach medicine this afternoon. But the good news is my swallowing is much improved today. I can't eat yet but drinking is becoming easier. At least I am able to swallow my pills.

So will continue this routine the rest of the week, Hydration tomorrow, work a little and sleep and rest and drink. Every day away from treatment is better. I may not totally feel like it but the body has to do its business of healing and I have to give it the time. So all my caregivers are making sure I keep to the straight and narrow so it will heal faster. And they are right. Hard for me to do, but they are right.

My Philmont group leaves this Thursday for 11 days of backpacking. Not way I can go but I will think of them each day while they are out. By the time they get back I should be much improved. Not enough to backpack but enough to get back to a more normal life style.

My hair is coming back so will be back to shaving every day in a couple of weeks. Still going to leave my head bald for the summer, at least.

Thank you for your continued support. When treatment is over, one thinks (at least I did) that everything would be alot better. Not so with cancer. The body has too much of its own healing to do. So the next 10 days are pretty critical to my getting healthy again. So will take it easy and rest. God Bless each of you this day.

Recovery = phase 1

Well, what I thought would be nothing but blue skies ahead has not been that! I spent the weekend throwing up as I could not stay hydrated even with the tube.My throat would not cooperate as I could barely swallow. So I spent most of the weekend sleeping, throwing up and trying to keep liquids down.

So at 8:30am this morning I was back at Allison undergoing hydration again. Will do it several times this week to give my throat time to heal so I can start drinking and eating. I was told this morning that July 17 is the date I will start feeling good again and being able to eat and drink. So I will be seeing the wonderful people at Allison helping me stay hydrated until my throat starts to heal up. Just a minor setback. Not one I was really expecting. As Lucille and I looked back, I should just now be starting the recovery process from the last of the chemo process and who knows about radiation. So will focus on trying to stay hydrated, keeping a positive attitude and getting healed.

So right now I am looking at a two phase recovery. The initial recovery is until I am able to eat and drink without a tube. The second phase will be the full recovery of getting back to a normal routine, gaining weight, and helping others.

God doesn't let more happen to us than we can bear. And today more than ever, I believe that I am here because his has additional chores for me to do. You can't out give God. You can just hope we measure up to what he knows we can do. Have we all done our part glorifying God today?

What a final day!

Good morning all..

Got up as normal yesterday thinking that I would just take radiation and a little hydration and things would be great for the day. The radiation went well, received a gift from the radiation department and my mask. I knew that I had to do recovery time but felt so much better mentally knowing that I had endured 8 weeks of radiation. I will tell you there were times that if not for God carrying me I would have made it! But I am here today that I was feeling pretty good.

Went to chemo doctor and was told that a couple of blood counts were done. Little did I realize that the 2 hour treatment that I have done all week would now become a 5 hour treatment. I was the last patient left in the chemo room yesterday. It was not what I had anticipated for this day.

And then as Adam was driving me down the street home, I saw all the signs and cards and family standing in front of the house. Needless to say, whatever I was feeling at that moment from the last day of treatment went away and turned to tears as I started reading the cards and posters from everyone. Adam and Sarah had put this together behind my back and it was just what I needed when I got home. The pictures above are just a few of what awaited me. I'll post a few more later.

The day being done, the final treatment being done. They can't do anymore. I've had maximum chemo and maximum radiation for this bad boy. And I truly believe it is gone. This cancer just wanted to take a final stab at me this day because it knew it did not win this battle. So as the day came to a close, my mental state is much better and I am ready for the recovery period. For getting back into the saddle, for finishing projects, for getting back to a normal schedule. But most of all, I am ready to eat. I am supposed to be able to eat most solids in about 10 days. But I am pumped knowing that this part if finished and that Lucille and I are ready to move to the next phase.

The support of each of you who have prayed, sent cards, emails, or just read this blog have given us the strength to see this through. There are many thank yous to hand out and I am sure I will miss some, but know that I have said a special prayer for each and everyone one of you.

And then there was the special note from from Randy Auburg. He is a cancer survivor and is going through treatments. His notes and comments from his blogspot were so heart felt. There couldn't be enough medicine to keep the tears from flowing. Our prayers will be with Randy and his wonderful family as he continues radiation at MD Anderson.

A special thank you goes out to Region 18 - where Lucille works. The support of the staff through prayers, words, cards and especially help with her work schedule was such a blessing not only to her but to me. It has meant so much that Lucille was able to spend the time necessary taking care of me and I truly appreciate all of you for helping Lucille and me.

As we go into the July 4th weekend, it will always be a more special date for me. And thanks to you and to God, I am able to continue on helping others. Later gang....

The final treatment awaits me!!

Did not sleep particularly well last night. Was pretty restless and am sure that I kept Lucille up alot of the night with my coughs. But had my next to last day of radiation and did hydration this am. Tomorrow I get to take my mask home where I will hang it in my office as a reminder of the events of the last few months. I'm sure it will be quite a conversation piece!

Am feeling pretty good right now. The real test will be this weekend and staying hydrated myself. But hopefully I can start on soft diet this weekend and getting back to eating real food within the next couple of weeks. I know how my grandson feels when he had one thing to eat and his body wanted something else. The same is happening to me. I will not miss the MusL Blast at all. But it has probably kept me out of the hospital for the last several weeks. So for that I am thankful.

Lots of new patients in the chemo room today. One lady was stuck six times this morning as she was terrified of the port. So on my way I stopped and comforted her and to let her know that this port will make life alot easier. Today was her first day of treatment. And if these nurses can't get a good stick then no one can.

I still don't know my silver lining but will trust it will come in God's good time. All I know is that the wonderful people I have meet over the last 4 1/2 months plus all the wonderful support from ya'll that this would not have been possible.

I am off morphine now, my neck looks good. I get basicly 2 months to recover before any tests - a CT and PET scan. It would be great to be on the lake or BBQ with friends this weekend but will stay at home and relax and recover. I look forward to taking less drugs and being able to lay flat on the bed. To wear normal clothes again and not look like I can't find the right pants to wear!

See ya tomorrow!!

And then there were 2 left

Slept fitfully last night but made up for this morning by sleeping 3 hours while I was being hydrated again. Had another day of radiation. Still on go for recovery starting July 3. The days seem to be dragging at this point as I wait for the final two treatments and doctors appointments. It will be long time before I stop going to Allison Cancer Center but the trips will just slow down. I still have a CT and PET scan sometime in the near future, and get this PEG tube removed. I look forward to start trying food again next week and trying to get back up to speed energy wise. The main thing is not to try and get it all done in a week! (Who me?)

I have a couple of other little issues I will try and get resolved this week and then all systems are go for recovery. The people at Allison are a wonderful and caring group of people. Their passion for help goes beyond what they have to do for a job. And while I will not miss the treatments I will miss the people who have treated me. There cannot be enough thank yous given to these folks for their outstanding devotion. And I can say the same thing about the oncology unit at MMH. These people are dedicated to helping people with cancer, and I will never forget them.

I was listening to a young man talk to a new patient this morning. The goods and bads of his chemo treatment. And it made me think of my treatments and thoughts and highs and lows since it began on Feb 24.

Today I am a cancer survivor, and on Thursday I will be a cancer survivor in recovery. It has been a long time for me. I am ready to start on the next phase.

Tis Monday

It has been a long weekend! The dry heaves have overtaken me this weekend leaving me in a collapsed heap! But got dehydrated this morning and feel better. Will sleep more this afternoon in hopes of getting some energy back. Will have re hydration thru Thursday this week. Hopefully there will be no more chemo, just the 3 remaining radiations.

The doctor said that he was giving up a special prayer for this week. He evidently knew something I didn't. I thought it would be an ok week once chemo was out of the way and on 15 minutes a day of radiation. But so far it has been the worst week yet!

It takes longer for me to swallow now. Have to constantly drink water and some coffee to try and keep my mouth moist. Speaking more than a couple of minutes is really tough. So I don't talk as much and certainly can't yell! All I can do is whisper.

I think Friday evening, I had some salmon. And while the strong taste was not there like before at least there was some taste. But that was the lull before the storm.

But three more days of treatment and the healing can start. My neck looks great and is pretty much healed. By the end of the week, that part of this ordeal should be over.

As I sat in the waiting room today, I looked around and saw new faces. People who have cancer fixing to start their treatment process. And it made me think of the chain of events from Feb 4 til today. It has reared its ugly head. Just as one gets cured another starts. I am saying a special prayer for all those new folks who are fixing to go through their treatment. Some will be ok, others will be bad. We all react differently even from week to week. You watch tv, people doing normal things, people eating, running, enjoying life. And that is the hope of those of us that has cancer has to hang onto. That we will too be enjoying life again!

Later gang....